Savvy Therapy

Disappointment is the gap that exists between expectation and reality (John C Maxwell)

Disappointment means sadness or displeasure caused by the non-fulfilment of one’s hopes or expectations.  When someone considers an action there is an expectation of a payoff.  If the outcome is less than expected then disappointment is experienced.  The opposite emotion is 

experienced if the payoff is greater than expected – elation.  

Disappointment when someone you trust does not meet up to your expectations.  Constant disappointment can lead to blame, resentment and sometimes rage.  Disappointment is thinking about what might have been instead of what is.  Disappointment has a deep sense of sadness and finality within it.  Of recognising that you will not achieve what you expected to.   Disappointment also leads to anger and apathy where you don’t care about anything and you don’t want anything.  

When we are excited by our expectations – of a new job, a new relationship we are excited by the prospect and waves of serotonin are released which combine with other feel good hormones and make us feel light and full of energy.  Disappointment triggers another set of hormones which results in a feeling of sadness, inertia and hopelessness.

Disappointment leads to pessimism.  When someone feels let down; the expectation is that the future will lead to further let down.  Disappointment can lead to impulsive decision making.  However, disappointment provides information to us about what is important in our lives.  If the thing that is causing the disappointment cannot be overcome then the expectations must be revised.  

So what has disappointment got to do with overeating.  Without realizing it, painful experiences you have pushed out of your awareness may be fueling your overeating, along with low motivation, anxiety, depression and relationship difficulties. This may seem odd because you may believe your overeating is due to a lack of will power and difficulty coping with current problems or situations. But in truth, your current pain is actually the tip of a big iceberg of pain buried deep within, or what I call old pain.



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